I’d like to start out by saying that I absolutely love people and I adore relationships of all kinds…romantic, friendship, family, work, etc. But that doesn't mean that it's always easy relating to other people, am I right? I’ve come to learn, though that even the feisty, difficult, “Oh my freaking God I wanna rip my hair out” kind of relationships hold something dear to be cherished. The lessons we learn from our most trying times provided by our relationships, are what stretch and bend us, set our healthy limits and personal boundaries and no, that’s not a bad thing at all.
When we are being authentic in our personal boundaries, we treat ourselves in such a way that sets the standard for the rest of the world as well. So, there’s simply no room for “Joe Schmoe” to come prancing into your life treating you like a pail of garbage, because you simply don’t allow it into your field of existence. It's saying something is better or worse than, it's merely a recognition of a certain desired frequency, and they simply do not match up.
And this leads us to to expectations which I’ve written about before and gotten a lot of great feedback for, so I’d like to give it another go, but with a twist. This time, let’s focus more on what we expect from OURSELVES rather than those around us.
In my previous article, What To Expect From You Everyday Expectations, I went into all of the various ways that we put our energy out across the realms of existence that we might not even be aware of. First off, you need to know that there’s multiple realms and while interconnected they all “move” and “act” on their own accord; with their own style and uniqueness.
The different realms are physical, mental, emotional, spiritual and etheric and I highly suggest reading that article before continuing on, but even without knowledge of the realms I bet you’ll find a useful tip or two in the words beyond…
Most often our relationship are bouts of give and take and usually roles are clearly defined. But if those roles are ever challenged by one party or if something tremendous shifts,etc. then relationships as a whole can be entirely redefined or sadly even end at a whim’s notice. But alas, every relationship serves it’s purpose, and even those we expect to last until our dying days often fizzle and fade, and in the end it’s really up to each individual to determine the final destination of where that relationship status lands in their heart once the usual connection is broken.
If two conscious individuals unite in a relationship, changes are much better that if and when the union ends, the departure will not be quite as a dramatic as the typical relationship, because with awareness comes an understanding always of a purpose higher than ourselves and our emotional responses to any given moment in time. It also comes with the understanding of desires, motivations, the Ego, the self with a little s .vs a big S, etc. and if you’re lucky a knowing that each person is THEIR OWN SOURCE! Therefore just as the union came together in love, so can each person allow such a respectful and honest, unattached letting go if and when the times comes to do so.
Sadly, so many relationships begin in a dazed and confused stupor of puppy love infatuation of what we want people to be. We refuse to foresee the flaws we know will eventually show themselves and temporarily convince ourselves these people are unwavering perfection, and we delight in the fact they think the same of us! Oh, what a high! 🙂 But when we instead really see people from the get-go for what they are and not what we want them to be nor what we can tell they're trying to be, we will understand better that everyone is a mere traveler here, that everyone is still learning and growing and that while technically we all are perfect because we are of Divine Creation, we are here to experience the illusion of imperfection, so that we can expand in third-dimensional reality and live as conscious creators ourselves. So, it's wise when falling in love to simply not fall with blinders on.
For most of us, though in the dust-storm high of new love, we start to dump our expectations on this new person to fulfill desires and wants in our lives, and if they do we stay the path, but if and when they don’t, especially if they were at first, then we twist our version of who we thought we knew and loved and withdraw, don’t we? And the games begin…
How about we try something new? How about we stop using one another as our source of happiness and realize it's always been US?
If we teach our children to go within for strength, courage, and ultimately to love themselves enough to trust their instincts, to set healthy boundaries, etc. then perhaps we can raise the next generation to not look to MTV to see what is acceptable to wear or how they should talk. How about we instead raise independent, beautiful, kind-hearted kids that not only love themselves, but love each other and bring this into adulthood? Then we will be granted a new generation that knows to go within to find their confidence; to BE their own Source. Remember, they don’t call it SELF-worth for nothing!
That sounds like a great plan right there, humanity…let’s get on it! 🙂 So. Much. Love. <3
Tamara Rant is a Co-Editor/Writer for CLN as well as a Licensed Reiki Master, heart-centered Graphic Designer and a progressive voice in social media activism & awareness. She is an avid lover of all things Quantum Physics and Spirituality. Connect with Tamara by visiting Prana Paws/Healing Hearts Reiki or go to RantDesignMedia.com
Tamara posts new original articles to CLN every Saturday.
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This article was originally created and published by Conscious Life News and is published here under a Creative Commons license with attribution to Tamara Rant and ConsciousLifeNews.com. It may be re-posted freely with proper attribution, author bio, and this Copyright/Creative Commons statement.
THAT’s exactly CORRECT ‘n truthful ‘ THE MAIN SOURCE ‘IS YOU? NO OTHER ‘ twist necessary TO BACK ‘ CHANGE ? There’s THE SMALL WORLD ‘ concealed in ONESELF ‘ set A CHANCE ‘ n to translate A CHANGE ‘ from inside OUT ‘ excel it TO REFORM ‘ the change ‘ll take place AUTOMATICALLY’ that YOU SHOULD LEARN ‘ to accept n ACKNOWLEDGE ‘ surroundings AIN’T you can CHANGE ‘ it’s WITHIN YOU ‘ therein. Tq.
Let you see yourself first, then command on others. Is it the one you tried to point out ?
Nina Danner Bernadette Colanduoni Danner. Tamara is the daughter of my friend, Donna Handel Laos Cowger. She might have some useful insight for you Nina in your studies @ Seton. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind if you contacted her. I like what she writes. ?
She wouldn’t mind at all. Her mission as a life coach is to help others. Her name is Tamara Rant. She writes really insightful articles.
I’ve enjoyed reading her articles that you’ve posted. My niece, Nina, is a freshman at Seton Hall Univ. and she is majoring in psychology. I just think Tamara’s writings might help Nina with some of her studies and thinking. ? I know Nina’s ultimate goal is to help people, too. If nothing else, Tamara can give her a viewpoint.
Happy to talk with her anytime! And thank you, I appreciate your support! <3