Tantric Intimacy & Sex: Why It’s Important

By Katrina Bos | Collective Evolution

Many people begin the journey into tantra because they hear that they can have AMAZING SEX!! (And who doesn’t want that?)

Others feel the mystical call of the ancient spiritual path of tantra — the desire to experience the divine in every moment of their lives, the desire to truly awaken to their full divine/human potential.

And many feel broken in some way. They’ve had painful past relationships, sexual difficulties, feelings of being disconnected and having lost meaning in their lives, and hear that the path of tantra can help them.

The truth is that in order to experience the phenomenal bliss and ecstasy of tantric intimacy, we have to embrace all three.

Related Article: A Simple & Fun Guide on How to Have Sacred (Tantric) Sex

Tantra Forces Us To Get Real!

The magic of practicing tantra is that we absolutely have to get real with ourselves if we are going to have a tantric experience. We can learn techniques and do group exercises and read books. But if we don’t actually look into our hearts, our brokenness, and our challenges and heal them, we will not find the ecstasy that we’re looking for.

This is because tantric experiences are energetic. Yes, there can be physical aspects to the experience for sure. But the ecstasy, unboundedness, and divine experience are energetic.

And energy can’t lie.

Whoever you are right now is who you bring to the experience. Whatever fears, worries, pain, and struggles you are having are all present energetically.

Physically, we can pretend. We can talk a good talk. We can dress properly and take care of ourselves. But none of this matters when you are sitting in front of another human being desiring to truly merge with them.

In fact, this is why when we first begin studying tantric intimacy and we eye-gaze with someone, it can be incredibly uncomfortable… We often laugh or make light of it. But truthfully, we are very uncomfortable with someone else seeing into our truth… that we aren’t as strong as we are trying to be, that we don’t have it all together, that we are vulnerable, that we are longing, that we are lost…

These are scary realities to share with others… and scary to admit to ourselves.

Bringing The Divine Into Our Healing

The foundation of tantra is integrating the divine into our day-to-day lives.

This is key in our healing path.

Many of our struggles are old. They come from our childhoods.

But we must have compassion for ourselves and know that the only reason they are a “struggle” is that we just don’t know what to do with them. Maybe we have talked with counselors. Maybe we run or work out when life becomes too much to handle. Maybe we medicate ourselves with everything from drugs (illegal and prescription) to excessive busyness. Regardless, at this point in our lives, we don’t have the tools, the awareness, or the strength to make the changes necessary to relieve us of these struggles.

All these changes when we start integrating the divine into our process.

Related Article: Men: Experience Greater Sexual Bliss and Vitality With This Ancient Tantric Practice

Our Healing Path

It starts with an idea of what the ‘divine’ is. What feels right to you deep in your soul? It might be a combination of descriptions you’ve heard over your lifetime. Or maybe it’s just that you know that there is “something more” out there. All we need to do is believe it enough to trust it.

And then we do various exercises… maybe eye-gazing, maybe meditation, maybe intimate exercises. And in that intimacy with ourselves, issues arise. Previously, these issues were overwhelming because they overwhelmed us in the past. So we stop. We freeze. We bring up a self-protection mechanism to stop us from feeling whatever painful feeling is triggered.

But in our practice of tantra, we remember that there is more in the world than just us. We can close our eyes and ask for help. We can feel comforted by a presence that we cannot see. We can trust the wisdom that is beyond our understanding. And at this moment, we realize that there is another option to take in our healing. Intuition whispers in our ear. A prayer is answered. However we hear it, our healing takes a new direction.

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