Pruning the Tree of Expectation: How What We See Has Roots in What We’re Looking For

Image result for expectations quoteIn all my years of truth-seeking and soul-searching, I’ve learned that ultimately what we find depends heavily on what we are looking for. I know many if not all of you have heard that saying before or at least something like it, which basically reflects upon the notion that what has our attention and focus the most and what we are putting our energy and drive into, will always affect the outcome of the situation(s) we find ourselves experiencing. In other words, we always play a vital role in creating our own lives and literally the worlds we live in. Yes, I said worlds. I say that in plural form because based on this premise, I have also devised that we are all in and of ourselves our own dimensions, as deep, vast and wide as the Universe itself. And as with all dimensions, we have the potential to know our capabilities and expand upon them, if we would only stop to look…within.

See, the moment we incarnate we are bombarded with outside stimuli from the physical world that demand our attention and we rightly so give it to learn how to navigate this new environment to ensure our greatest chances for survival. However, it is rare that we are taught that this is not the only place to get your cues in life from. Sure, we often get the good old generic lessons passed down to us like, “always trust your gut” or “follow your heart”, but these cookie-cutter conversation pieces are rarely ever more deeply explored even though they carry some serious hidden gem insights. And this must lead us to wonder are they really understood and communicated from one generation to the next on what it really means to do either?

My own gut tells me no, although I also believe that even with the state of things in the world today, more parents are catching onto the fact that when you walk your walk, your kids tend to respect you for it. And this is what I would call ‘Pruning the Tree of Expectation’. You see, somehow when parents become parents they immediately fill themselves up with all of these expectations; from themselves, from their new child, and from the world that is about to welcome their new child and them as a new parent in the world.

They might really get down on themselves if they are scared about not knowing how to be a good mom or dad. They might start mapping out a full-detailed life plan for the child who unbeknownst to him if he doesn’t follow it, his mother will resent him. They might expect the world to now treat them differently, one way or another. Whatever the case might be, when we put expectations onto ourselves, other people or honestly anything outside of our control, then we are only setting ourselves up for major disappointments.

The key is learning what the driving force behind your motivation is. Because what drives us is what will determine where we end up. When we place heavy expectations on our loved ones, its as if we are seeing our own version that we want them to be in the future, and we are putting our love towards that. Instead of directing our energy towards the reality in front of us with acceptance, (which is the only thing that will ever allow the present version to blossom into anything more), we are literally living in a future that most likely will never even happen. Or to put it another way, we are living in our own damn world and expecting others to come live in it with us. And when they don’t how upset we get, don’t we? 😉

I’ve recently learned to live and let live, love and let love. When you meet people exactly where they are and simply show them that it’s simply OK to BE exactly who they are in this very moment, deserving of love, you will be amazed how that can open a person’s heart; especially your very own.

Never stop pruning those inner trees, my friends. That’s what keeps the roots deep and the fruits ripe. Much love…


Tamara Rant is a Co-Editor/Writer for CLN as well as a Licensed Reiki Master, heart-centered Graphic Designer and a progressive voice in social media activism & awareness. She is an avid lover of all things Quantum Physics and Spirituality. Connect with Tamara by visiting Prana Paws/Healing Hearts Reiki or go to

Tamara posts new original articles to CLN every Saturday.

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This article was originally created and published by Conscious Life News and is published here under a Creative Commons license with attribution to Tamara Rant and It may be re-posted freely with proper attribution, author bio, and this Copyright/Creative Commons statement.

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