By Alex Myles | Elephant Journal
Some of mens’ deepest needs in their relationships are for approval, respect, to know that they are appreciated and that ultimately, to know they are our superheroes.
When a man’s needs are met, they are automatically inspired to try harder, become better partners and aim for higher levels of success, not only within their intimate relationships, but in all other areas of life too.
To understand and achieve this, we must accept that men and women are a little different.
Women can be slightly more emotional and sway more to desire love and affection and although men need these things too, they also place high value on being shown appreciation, being validated and respected. That is when they are at their best.
This is not a list of rules, nor is it to be expected that all men will feel the same way as one another. It is just an outline and guide to understand some of the things that men generally value highly within their relationships.
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- Protection—However strong and independent females are, guys still have the innate desire to want to protect us. Usually the protection comes from the simplest everyday things. Allow them, because we protect them from a lot of things too—just in different ways. Whether it’s shielding us from the rain with their coats, getting up in the night to investigate strange noises or giving that creepy guy a look that tells them to quit staring, there are countless ways they can make us feel safe. When he is in protection mode, he will feel like a super hero. He is at his most masculine, and endorphins will release to make him feel good. He and he alone wants to feel like he can fully protect—that for a man is extremely potent.
- Adventure—Men want a woman that they can have fun with. They want a buddy as well as a lover. Get involved with the things he enjoys; doing so will help with bonding and bringing you closer together. Take off the heels, play ball, go for a muddy woodland cycle, for dog walks, camp out, swim in a lake—adventure. Men will not care about messy hair and running mascara, as they’ll be too engrossed in the connection that’s happening to focus on anything else.
- Be his cheerleader—Praise him, have his corner, never criticise him in front of others, compliment, be grateful, believe in him, show him that you are proud of him and stay by his side when the going gets tough. Tell him how important he is to you, how attractive he is and how he makes your world a better place.
- Space—When men have had a little space, they will bounce back stronger than before. Allow him his freedom and never resent it. Encourage him to submerge himself in his hobbies, sports and friendships. Trust him, let him pursue his passions and allow him to find the things in life that define him, other than your relationship.
- Sex—Men love sex, women love sex. Not all, but for most, the sexual side of a relationship is one of the most important parts for creating intimacy and keeping the relationship healthy and alive. Men needto feel sexy, to know that we are attracted to them physically. However, generally speaking, men don’t just love any sex, for a lot of men, they only find it fully pleasurable when they are in a committed relationship with someone they love.
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They don’t want it to be a chore or something they feel is one sided—your pleasure is highly important to him. He wants to know how much you want it too. Be adventurous and explore each other. This is the one side to your partner that no one else has. Find new ways to keep it fresh and exciting: dress up, introduce fun props and find ways to give it an edge to really keep his mind thinking about you all day long.
