How to Be Grateful For Those Times You’re Unappreciated

Image result for givingWe all have those times in life where we feel unseen or unheard. We might share some awesome ideas at a team meeting at work, only to have those ideas ignored, but later implemented under the impression that your boss came up with the idea. Or perhaps you are the type of person who always goes out of their way for others and rarely considers your own needs first.

While I'm not saying this sucks, I'm saying I've had enough experiences in my life with this particular feelings to begin to really understand it's motivation and what it's trying to teach me. And from the countless conversations I've had with other people going through similar growth and shadow work, I believe the lesson is rather Universal.

We are all taught from a young age that sharing is a good thing and of course that's true. But if you're taught that you should feel guilty for what you have rather than grateful, or even taught to be grateful with guilt, then it can warp your sense of what sharing and giving is really all about…at least it always did for me.

You see, guilt was always a HUGE motivator in my family. I would see it flung around from relative to relative wrapped around invitations and favors left and right. I saw people turn down amazing opportunities and life experiences due to the level of guilt attached to what those actions would mean about them. And thus motivations piled on not by the truth of their existence, but rather by the false impressions of others.

These impressions ultimately created the false beliefs about the Self and what it truly means to give and receive. Because where there's guilt, there is then the false impression that some of us deserve some things, while others do not, and then giving becomes an act motivated by measurable judgments of presumed character, which can change by personal perception, so it's about as accurate as “common sense”.

And it's funny how life teaches us its lessons, and as it seems all lessons are those of the heart. It appears there are no greater or more effective means of learning that human suffering. And I'm speaking purely here of the mental anguish we put ourselves through by repeating painful patterns created by emotional ties and unfulfilled needs. For it's when we never put the knowledge gained from those lessons into action, that they will continue to repeat, and like the mighty snowball continue to grow in size and power as it takes you downhill and a rapidly increasing rate of speed, freezes your heart.

I don't know about you, but I feel much better when I'm giving from a place of warmth and tenderness, but even now there's is the test of the lesson to have no expectations tied to your giving. Even if you don't get a thank you, it does not remove or reduce the emotion, the intention or purpose behind your giving, so the lesson, albeit a tough and rather annoying one to the ego is to give for no reason.

So, my friends, I share with you today another one of the greatest lessons I've ever learned and it involves changing the entire way you look at the lessons you learn! When we are able to expand our view outward, imagine something like a telescope, we provide ourselves a grander view of what the hell is going on. Being human, sometimes…okay all the time…it's difficult not to get caught up in our own drama. And yet if we take a mere moment, yes I'm serious, a single deep breath will do it to bring you into the moment, and consciously direct where our next move, our next thought will go, we are choosing to be empowered fully.

Think about it. We are not waiting for someone to make us think, feel, want, need, do or say anything. We are fully focused on US. How we feel in ALL our layers. And why does this magic moment occur? Because the breath is your connection to everything else. Your inner and outer world and when you learn to focus on it, you also learn that it is the literally reigns that control the direction of your entire life.

I know it might sound a bit ridiculous, but the more you practice this, the more you naturally find yourself in your heart. And here comes the good part…When you are living in your heart, that zooming out is no longer necessary and giving takes on a whole new meaning. Because YOU are always there, appreciating yourself; giving of yourself TO yourself. And you've tapped into the fact that this is the key to being able to give the most to others. All you need to do is be brave enough to turn it and open the door.

Tamara Rant is a Co-Editor/Writer for CLN as well as a Licensed Reiki Master, heart-centered Graphic Designer and a progressive voice in social media activism & awareness. She is an avid lover of all things Quantum Physics and Spirituality. Connect with Tamara by visiting Prana Paws/Healing Hearts Reiki or go to

Tamara posts new original articles to CLN every Saturday.

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This article was originally created and published by Conscious Life News and is published here under a Creative Commons license with attribution to Tamara Rant and It may be re-posted freely with proper attribution, author bio, and this Copyright/Creative Commons statement.

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