I posted a video earlier on my personal Facebook page that speaks to being pretty damn vulnerable. I haven’t done a video in almost a year and I'll say this one gets a little deep into some teary-eyed vulnerability. Instead of my usual need to first critique myself, cut and edit footage, etc. before posting…I just let it out and then I just put it out…for all to see.
In other words, I made a conscious choice to be vulnerable. And even though stuff like that can be scary as shit, and you will always have that part of you telling you why not to, why you can’t…once you do…something shifts. Sometimes turns on and a connection is made…or rather a reconnection to a really REAL part of yourself. And I’m happy to say that facing the fear of letting go is what has provided me the strongest sense of security I’ve felt in a long time…
I knew I had been ignoring that voice within for far too long pressing me to take a chance and show up more in my own life. To quit preaching not to judge, and start talking to and treating myself with more respect, honor, and appreciation. I think this is perhaps one of the most terrifying things for people to do. We don’t think twice before crossing oceans for our loved ones, but we will barely skip a puddle for our own peace of mind…until we have no choice.
Usually, the Universe will give you hints to things it’s trying to bring to the surface and get you to look at. If you’re reading this then you probably know this is how the Universe will always communicate with you, but only as long as you are listening, right? Well, that is at least what many of us believe.
The Universe will actually continue speaking to you at this disco I call life, whether you’re listening or not. But since you’re surrendering your rightful spot as the DJ, the same old song will keep playing over…and over…and over…and over again until you come back into the awareness of who you are, which requires remembering you even started playing a song in the first place. Regardless, consider the song playing to be your life and then perhaps many things may come into perspective for you as to why certain things never seem to change, get better, or just “keep happening” to you and why some things seem to be literally on repeat.
The Universe doesn’t care what you want, sorry. It only receives the energy signature you are broadcasting out, and therefore it can only respond accordingly in how it delivers back energy as the experiences in your life. Because this appears as things just happening to you, this makes it easy to place blame on others when things don’t go right, etc. But you really never lose your spot as DJ; you simply fall asleep on the job…you go from being conscious of your feelings, reactions, etc. to unconscious i.e. reactive. But regardless, it is YOU who’s energy, in every given moment, is setting the energy that pulls the next…You can go through this motion empowered, conscious, holding the reigns, director of the show…or you can tap out, switch off, lay down in the seat and put it on auto-pilot…
Many of us live in this mode for a good portion if not all of our lives because it feels safe; it is familiar and frankly ‘familiar’ is easy and comfortable and we like that same old story, don’t we? I don’t know about any of you, but I am fucking tired of telling THAT story.
For some of us, it often gets to the point where the Universe must finally take a proverbial 2×4 to our head in the form of “life shit” because let’s face it, we are too stubborn to change the negative patterns we’ve developed to cope with the confusion of not knowing how to properly deal with certain emotions. But as I’ve researched and committed to exploring these emotions and no longer running from then, I’m actually starting to learn how to build some beautiful shit with all those 2×4‘s!
What I’m coming to really love is proving to myself that the more steps I take on the invisible bridge of the unknown, the closer I get to know who I really am. And I think for all of us, this healing journey is something so very personal, that even if you don’t do it to connect with others at first, do it to connect with your own Soul because this in itself is a gift.
What we’re not often taught is the more we face what is uncomfortable, the more vulnerable we are willing to be, the less terrifying that actually IS because that is how you take away the power of fear and discomfort. In fact, it is the ONLY way. I often think of the quote, “The only way out is through”…
And I feel like while it was scary losing the light of the entrance of where I came in on this journey, taking a chance on myself to brave the dark has been the most empowering thing I’ve ever done in my life. It is beginning to feel less like something I must do, and beginning to feel like something I look forward to doing.
It’s the type of shift that leaves a permanent mark on your heart. It’s similar to how the energy changes when you can make a crying friend with tears in their eyes laugh at a stupid joke. That “pop” or release that even if you know not a drop about energy, feelings, psychology, awareness…it doesn’t matter. A simple shift in energy is all it takes to help you once again know the truth of who you are, which is pure consciousness; pure love.
Knowing we are love is what allows us also to be vulnerable and connect vulnerably with another…which is really just another way of saying you are willing to let the walls down or be open with someone. We may not consciously know that this has happened when we feel that pull to chill out and go apologize or reconnect, etc. but that is literally what just occurred. You got out of your own way and the truth was able to reach your heart.
We all guard most that which we want so dearly to give away…the love that resides so deeply in our hearts we have forgotten it is there. And that is what being vulnerable is all about. Helping ourselves and one another remember the truth. And we can all feel that, simply because we all ARE it. So keep braving that wave of emotions because any shift closer to your heart is a shift closer to your happiness.
Tamara Rant is a Co-Editor/Writer for CLN as well as a Licensed Reiki Master, heart-centered Graphic Designer and a progressive voice in social media activism & awareness. She is an avid lover of all things Quantum Physics and Spirituality. Connect with Tamara by visiting Prana Paws/Healing Hearts Reiki or go to RantDesignMedia.com
Tamara posts new original articles to CLN every Saturday.
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This article was originally created and published by Conscious Life News and is published here under a Creative Commons license with attribution to Tamara Rant and ConsciousLifeNews.com. It may be re-posted freely with proper attribution, author bio, and this Copyright/Creative Commons statement.
