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5 Simple Ways to Ask Someone Out on a Date

Posted by on December 10, 2020 in Relationships & Sex with 0 Comments

Nobody likes rejection. Scientific studies have shown that the emotional response from being rejected is similar to the pain we experience from physical injuries. No wonder some people feel it so bad that they end up making hurtful decisions.

Despite this, we cannot stop living and hide our emotional fears. We have to risk the possibility of rejection once in a while to get what we want in life. It is never easy, but it makes you stronger.

Read this article on five ways to ask someone out on a date. Whether you are a man wondering how to ask her out or a lady wishing to take this first step, this guide is for you.

1.    Make a Game Plan

The most important thing is to come up with a game plan. It is crucial that you reduce the risk of rejection as much as possible.

But don’t worry, this does not have to be something stressful either. You can make a simple plan that will get you a date and take the relationship to the next level if you wish to.

Here are a few things to do:

Find out if they are in a relationship

Being rejected never feels good. And even though it may not be something personal, it may still send a sensation to some people that they are not worthy.

If you a sensitive person, it might be even harder to understand why your crush rejected you. And hence, you want to reduce that risk as much as possible.

Establishing whether the person is in a relationship or not is a good way to do this. Besides, it will save you a great deal of effort and time.

How do you do this? Do not start by asking them directly if they are engaged. It is essentially guaranteed they will say no, and it is inappropriate and unfair to the person they are in a relationship with. Besides, it reflects poorly on your morality.

Use other ways to find out for yourself about their situation. It is always good to get to know someone well before asking them out. And this is one of the things you need to learn about the theme.

Be confident

We are only laying the foundation for asking someone out with a chance of getting a yes. Confidence is the number one trick to this game.

We already know that rejection is painful, and it’s a possibility. It is this fear that makes many people stay as far as possible. They think it is better for them to avoid taking a risk so that they won’t experience the consequences of rejection.

And yet, we must all be rejected at some point in life to grow. Hence, you need to gather your confidence and make your mark where it matters most.

Start by deciding beforehand what you will do if the answer is no. If you are asking a friend out, this will determine the fate of your friendship henceforth.

Preparing for rejection helps you deal with the emotional effect that comes with it. You don’t want to appear physically beaten before the other person.

But don’t let this preparation get in the way of your confidence. If anything, it should be the best way to build it by accepting that rejection is not the end, and you can always try with another person.

If possible, find out what you like in common

Thinking up good ideas for a date is never easy, especially if you don’t know the other person well. It would help tremendously if you knew what they like.

It could be music, some sport, or nature. Invite them to these events, and it will make your work much easier.

How do you want to ask them out?

Intending to ask someone out is very different from actually asking them. This is where things get more complicated.

If you are shy, consider sending them a text message or using social media. Texts are good when you’re afraid of the other person. At least this way you can hide your disappointment.

What if you don’t have their number yet? You might have to approach them physically. But don’t worry, this can be more rewarding than sending text messages.

2.    Asking out someone you know

Are you beginning to have more than normal feelings for your best friend? Well, there is no shame in telling them how you feel on the date.

The fact that you already know them does not mean it will be any easier asking them out. If anything, this could be the hardest thing for you. On the one hand, you want something more, but, on the other hand, you don’t want to lose their friendship.

Conversation starters

Begin with a casual conversation. Whether you are doing it in person or over text, this will help ease you toward the main question.

Send a check-up message. Something as simple as: “Hey, how are you doing?” If it is in person, just approach them with simple greetings. Make sure to keep a smile and eye contact.

Don’t ask them right away. Instead, ask them about their plans for the weekend, or any time you choose. This makes the conversation flow more naturally.

Ask them

You already know what activities they like by now, which should make things easier. Use this knowledge to ask them if they would like to go with you to do an activity.

If you cannot think of them, ask them out for a drink, dinner or lunch, a party, or ice-cream, among others. You should already have a good idea of what you are talking about.

Let them know it is not something too hard

It is crucial to tell them that there will be no hard feelings if they reject the invitation. This will set things clear so that those awkward moments that may follow are taken care of. It will also show them you are confident and mature enough to handle emotions.

3.    Asking someone you just Met

Asking a person you just met or want to meet out is more complicated. This is where the real rejection pain could come from.

However, if you really like them, it’s better that you do it once and for all. It will save you a lot of time and regret.

Make eye contact

Eye contact and a smile are the perfect signals to tell the other person that you like them. They may return the gesture, showing their interest too.

Do not be too quick to pursue if the person does not smile back and instead looks away. Find out if the person is really not interested, or if they are just shy. Don’t give up just yet.

Approach them and introduce yours

Always act confident when approaching someone you like. Even if you are shaking, do not let them see your fear. The first impression is crucial here, and confidence carries it all.

Find the right conversation starter

There are many ways of striking a conversation. Some start with a compliment, while others start with comments on what may be happening around them. Asking a question could also work well here. Think of something easy to ask them, but one that requires an open-ended response.

Ask them out

Once you have determined their interest, suggest meeting for a coffee, lunch, or dinner. Do not ask them out for a movie on the first date, as this may make it hard for you to get to know each other.

If she says ‘no,’ do not get emotional. Smile and say something like, “It was well worth a try and nice to meet you.” Do not disturb any further.

4.    Challenge them

Since you’ve already started a conversation and are interested, you can develop creative ways of asking them out.

Challenging them to do what you want them to, whether through a text or in-person, is another effective way of securing a date. Think of something like a fun dare game or a bet. But make sure they like the idea first.

“I bet you can never come up with a good date idea like I would (add your date idea). How about you?”

This can get them thinking of an idea to compare with yours, which you can work on to actualize. There is no better way to make someone go on a date with you than making it seem like the idea was theirs.

5.    Just Hit the Nail on the Head

Understanding that you may be rejected brings you the confidence to take your chances. You will be glad you got it over quickly, instead of living in a dilemma or regret not trying.

So, why don’t you just go ahead and ask them already? Whether you know them or not, it will be a good idea to get you going on with your life.

Body language is crucial in reading someone. Look into how someone may feel around you and use that to measure their reaction. This is easy when you are meeting in-person because you can discern her level of interest by looking out for reactions in her eye contact, whether she leans into you, innocently touches you, and many others.

If you are texting, consider how well they are responding to your texts. If they take too long or respond with short uninterested messages, that is not someone to continue with.

There you have it. Five simple ways of asking someone out on a date. The main point here is confidence.

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