Why We Shouldn’t Separate Boys and Girls For Sex Ed

Being in one’s teens is usually a hard experience both for youngsters and for their parents. It’s the time of puberty when children grow up and change in terms of their appearance and behaviour. Then, they particularly need their parents’ help, understanding and support. Unfortunately, in most cases, the reality is harsh, and adults avoid talking to their kids about such topics as pubescence, sex, and relationships. It’s usually caused by shame, but also the lack of expertise. That’s why teenagers are very often left alone and forced to learn about these things on their own. They are looking for answers on the Internet, where they may come across some misleading and unreliable information. Sometimes they even try to struggle with their sexual problems through buying some products from online pharmacies, such as medicinedirect.co.uk, because they feel afraid of asking a real pharmacist for advice.

Another source of their knowledge usually comes from school and sex education lessons. That is again debatable since youngsters are said to be ashamed of attending such classes and talking openly about sex with their teacher. Therefore, there are many approaches to how to deal with this situation. One of them is to separate boys and girls. But is it indeed the best solution for them? Shouldn’t they know about the other gender’s sexual organs and activities? Separating them won’t provide them with the full picture of sexual life. It may only lead to adolescents’ increased shame and in consequence, even sexual risk-taking behaviours, such as unwanted pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases and sexual victimisation.

Imposes boundaries between boys and girls

Separate lessons undoubtedly impose certain boundaries between boys and girls. They are already told that they can’t share this intimate sphere of their lives with the other gender. Because of different body structures and biological processes happening to boys and girls during their adolescence, they are believed to find out only about their own physical appearance and sexual organs. Such thinking is, however, outdated. We live in the 21st century, and sexual topics are no longer a taboo. Both boys and girls should be aware of their own biology to be able to speak out about their sexuality with their peers and parents. It’ll also be helpful to understand better their partner’s needs in the future. Otherwise, the lack of education and misinformation may lead to some relationship problems and even breakdown.

Stimulates deeper shyness

Contrary to popular belief, separating boys and girls during their sex education classes won’t make them less shameful and more open to conversation. It actually stimulates even deeper shyness among adolescents who are afraid of talking about such topics publicly. It may have serious consequences in the future. Let’s take the example of sexual harassment or abuse at work when the boss has molested a young woman, but she is ashamed of revealing the truth. Because of some social norms imposed on her in childhood, now she is scared and more likely to sweep the whole incident under the carpet, giving men consent to commit similar offences on other innocent women. If this woman had attended sex education lessons with men, now she would probably be more self-confident and adamant about protecting her rights.

Excludes kids who are not sure about their sexuality

Finally, there are still some children who aren’t sure about their sexuality yet. They even don’t know that they can feel different. By separating them during sex education along the traditional gender lines, they have been labelled in advance. But what about children who are transgender or non-gender conforming? Why should girls learn only about the menstrual period while they feel as if they were boys? There are more and more sex reassignment injuries, also among teenagers. Thus, schools shouldn’t take them the opportunity to acquire full knowledge. Quite the contrary- they should encourage teenagers to talk about their sexuality and feelings in front of their colleagues. That is so important while observing a growing tendency to commit suicides by adolescents who are left alone with their problems, unheard and misunderstood. They are only kids who need love and support. And who will give them these things if not parents and teachers?

To prevent and say definite NO to sexual abuse and assaults, we shouldn’t separate boys and girls at sex education classes. It’s not good or more helpful for them. Let’s make children well-educated and courageous to voice their opinions on various topics, not stereotyping them according to traditional gender roles.

Daria Skutecka