One of the biggest stumbling blocks to recovery is realizing that you’ve destroyed your life. Basically, that there is an endless list of things which your drug addiction may have cost you. This list can take the form of many things.
For many people it means their health. Drug addiction or alcohol may have seriously impacted your health, and this could be something you cannot get back. For other people it could be their family. Addicts are often completely estranged from their families. It’s possible that you’ve lost your marriage, children, parents, siblings or other family members.
With some addicts it could be the loss of employment, career, or their position in life. Addiction often makes it impossible to hold down a job. You may have spent many years in addiction, and missed out on the time that you needed to build a career. You may have lost your position in life. For some people it may be time. They may have wasted years of their life abusing drugs or alcohol.
To make things worse, you could be at an advanced age. There are many people who only address their drug and alcohol problems once reaching middle age says Johnny K – owner of True Life Recovery detox in Orange County, California. In this case, the feeling of loss may be far more intense.
On another level are the material objects which you have given up, lost, or forsaken. You may be lusting after things like money, a car, house, nice clothes, or something else. You may have nothing at all. In fact, may addicts only get into rehab once they’ve hit absolute rock bottom. After leaving treatment you may be starting from zero again, and for many people this can be a bitter pill to swallow. It may even lead to relapse.
Some people prefer to go back to addiction instead of doing the hard work of rebuilding their life. They look at their lives and think screw it, why bother, it’s too late and I’ve missed out. This is something which you must be aware of. It’s a clear and present danger and something that many addicts suffer from. In order to deal with this problem here are a few steps which could help you
1. Learn To Accept And Let Go
To overcome this problem you simply have to accept that drug addiction has cost you many things. This could be your family, friends, career, or even your home or health. Next, you have to learn to let go. There is no way around this. Feeling angry, bitter or remorseful is not going to help. These types of negative feelings will only hurt you. They will also impact your recovery and may even lead to a relapse.
Some people may refuse to do this. They prefer to stay the way they are, and blame other people for their problems. Unfortunately, as we’ve said, there is no way around this. What you also have to realize is that letting go makes you happier, healthier and more content. Once you’ve learned to let go you’ll immediately start to feel better. Your chances of a successful recovery will also greatly increase.
2. Realize That the Grass Isn’t Greener on the Other Side
One of the greatest truths in life is that you should never envy people. After all, the grass isn’t greener on the other side. Just because someone’s life looks good on the outside, doesn’t actually mean they are happy or having a good time. So many people fall into this trap. They are envious of people who are better looking, thinner, have more money, or more material objects.
You have to realize that things could be completely different in reality. Many people have all of the material objects you could ever desire and are still desperately unhappy. Realize that everything comes with pros and cons. You should never be jealous of anyone. For example, someone might have a great job and make lots of money, but they may also be burnt out from stress and spend all their time working. At the end of the day things are never as they seem.
3. Be Thankful for What You Have
No matter how bad things get you can always find something to be thankful for. For many addicts this should be easy. Consider the fact that you’ve actually recovered (or are recovering) from your addiction. Think of all the pain and suffering that you went through, and be thankful that you managed to come out on the other side. Realize that the majority of people aren’t nearly so lucky. The majority of people with addiction issues never get clean, and many of them eventually die from their illness. You’re one of the lucky ones!
Along with this, find other things to be thankful. It could be your health, your family, future plans, or anything. On the most basic level, you should be glad that you’re alive. Life is a precious gift and we should be thankful for it. Even if you have nothing there is always something you can be thankful for. Something as mundane as a sunny day can be a reason to feel good.
3. Be Thankful for What You Have
Yes, addiction problems have cost you everything. You’ve lost out on the good things in life. But this doesn’t mean you have to give up. Remember, throwing in the towel can lead to a spiral of negativity and depression that eventually leads to relapse. You cannot afford to get into this state of mind. You have to wake up in the morning, set goals, and continue working towards them.
Something else you have to realize is that many former addicts have gone onto phenomenal success. Just because you’ve had addiction problems doesn’t mean you have to feel like a failure. There is always hope if you’re willing to put in the work and anything is possible. After all, you’ve already taken the first step by overcoming your addiction.
5. Things Might End Up Being Better
This might sound incredible, but many people are thankful for their drug or alcohol addiction. Believe it or not this does actually happen. The reason why is because great suffering and difficulty can often make you a better person. You’ve probably experienced things that others never will, and this has forced you to grow as a person. Many people lead comfortable and boring lives, and will never have this opportunity. Be thankful for this.
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