It can be really difficult to watch a loved one go through a difficult time. Whether they are a friend, partner, or family member, it can be difficult to know precisely what they need. Here are some of our best tips so you can be certain that you are caring for them in the best possible way.
Recognize When You Can’t Help
It can be very noble to shoulder someone else’s worry and help them through one of the worst times of their lives. However, you also need to realise that you can’t do it all. If they have a very real and distressing issue that is upsetting their lives and the lives of those around them, it might be wise to call in some professional guidance.
Your loved one may not appreciate it at the time, but they will hopefully come to see that this was indeed the best option for everyone. For example, if you have a loved one who struggles with heavy drinking or narcotics, it might be best to enrol them in some form of addiction therapy. The right inpatient drug and alcohol treatment program will help them to eliminate bad habits and focus on the relationships they have with them. This could potentially save their lives and may be more effective than anything you could offer them in terms of support.
Set Up the Right Support Network
If you are going to support them in some capacity, it is also incredibly important that you do not try to do it all yourself. This can cause too much stress on your part and could result in you falling ill or heading towards temptations of your own. This is going to be of no benefit to either you or the loved one you are trying to help.
Instead, you need to ensure that there is a good network of people around you who are willing to work with you to help your loved one get the care they need. Creating a dependence on one single person is never going to end well. Whether you take it in turns to spend time with the loved one or make sure you do things entirely as a group, the extra bit of support can work wonders.
Remove Temptations
Make sure you speak to the one you are trying to help and have a frank and honest conversation about the triggers and stresses that cause them to fall into bad habits. The last thing you want to do is cause a relapse or a bad event through carelessness. While accidents can happen, there may be several things you can do and procedures you can put in place that lessen the chance that they might happen.
For example, if they struggle with an alcohol addiction, you should go through their home and remove any and all alcohol that they might have. This might include you having to perform an active search to ensure that you find it all. This can be a distressing event for your loved one but it can also help them in the long term if you can eliminate anything in their home that they could hurt themselves with.
You may then need to think about any activities as a group that you could partake in. For example, if you want to spend more time together, you need to make sure that you are not doing anything that could upset the person you are watching. For example, one of the worst places you could ask to meet a recovering alcoholic is in a bar. By making small adjustments like this, you can still encourage them to enjoy all the things they love the most without falling on old cruxes or temptations.
Be Prepared for Setbacks
No route to recovery is plain sailing. You can have all the perfect support network in place and a string of good behaviours and positive reinforcements in place to help them meet their goals, only for something major to happen that will bring them back to square one.
This can be devastating for all, but most importantly it can really hinder your loved one’s progress. Most of all, they could fall under the impression that they are beyond help, and that there is nothing that can be done to save them. This is obviously a very dangerous place for them to be in, and you need to ensure that there are some things that you can do to get them back on track.
Whether you have the phone number of their therapist or you are ready to distract them with some of their favourite activities, there is always something that you can do that has the potential to bring them back on track. One of the worst things is to assume that they are beyond help, and to abandon them. Setbacks are to be expected on the road to recovery, and you both need to learn how to handle them correctly.
Speak to Your Loved One Today
It is never too late to reach out and help some of the people who need it the most. No matter they may be dealing with, there is always the potential for you to be the guiding light that helps them through it. Take the time to address what they need from you, and you will hopefully find that everything else falls into place.
Supporting someone with an addiction is going to be tough, so make sure you take time for you too. No matter what they need from you, you should never drop your entire life to take care of them. Whether someone steps in to help out every once in a while or you just take an afternoon or two to yourself, it is incredibly important that you never stop caring for you.
Between this care and the perseverance of you both, you should soon see some positive changes to the life of your loved one. Any struggle can be overcome with the right support and a realistic attitude to recovery.
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