Being in a relationship doesn't always imply having lots of sex whenever you want. Sex is not as simple and exciting as it is shown in movies and written in books. It might be boring and frustrating. Moreover, the lack of sex or the lousy quality of it might be a reason for the number of fights between you and your partner.
Physical intimacy is one of the most important things in a loving relationship. It's not only about pleasure, but it also indicates trust and passion.
If you stopped enjoying sex with your loved one, you should know that's it's not a reason to break up and go dating again (the Tinder world is scary). It only means that it's time to start working harder on your relationship. The thing is that maintaining a great sexual connection requires constant efforts.
Is it even possible? Oh yes! You can have the best sex in your life with your long-term partner, no matter how many years you spent together (and how many children you raise together). Here is what you need to work on in order to improve physical intimacy in a relationship:
Start a conversation
It all starts with a conversation. Your partner might not even have a clue that you find your sex life boring and frustrating. That's why you need to talk to your loved one about it. Make sure not to bring this kind of conversation right after sexual intercourse since it might hurt your partner's feelings deeply.
Find a moment when you are both relaxed sitting on the couch. Avoid blaming your partner for boredom in your bedroom. On the contrary, you should suggest a solution to the existing problem. For instance:
- I would like to make love to you more often. Let's travel somewhere over the weekend to have more time for ourselves!
- I really want to try one thing in bed, and you are the only person who will understand.
- I need more affection from your side. Don't mind if we spend some time hugging today?
As you can see, in all these cases, you start the conversation with ‘I'. That's how you can avoid blaming your partner while bringing up the topic.
Bring some novelty
You need to create a WOW effect so that your partner will be as excited as you are. To do that, do something truly wild and sexy – piper sex doll , sex swing, or edible underwear! Let your partner know that you are eager to experiment and make their deepest sexual fantasies come true.
Also, tell your partner that you are ready to do all these crazy things only because you are in love with them. It will make your loved one feel truly special.
Other than that, consider taking your loved one for a trip at least for a couple of days. Changing locations can also bring some novelty and help to create that WOW effect that was missing in your long-term relationship.
Act like you are on honeymoon
No need to spend your savings to go to Paris just to feel like you are on honeymoon. Just start acting differently. For example, you can start kissing and hugging your partner more often, sending romantic texts in the middle of the day, or buying little presents. It doesn't cost much, but it can put the sexual spark back in your relationship.
At first, it will be your responsibility to set the mood. After a couple of romantic sessions, your partner will also want to please you the way you want it.
See a therapist
In case you can't solve your problems with an honest conversation, consider seeing a therapist together. The bad quality of sex life can also be an indicator of serious relationship problems. If you are not able to talk about that and answer a simple question ‘what holds us back', don't hesitate to seek professional help.
The best way to do that is to go together. However, if you can't speak with a therapist in front of your partner, you can always make an individual appointment.
Always recognize and respect the boundaries of another person. You should never force physical intimacy or use manipulations in the relationship. The best way to improve your situation is to admit that there is a problem and ask your partner to help you work on it.
The bottom line
To keep your sex life exciting in the relationship, you should be honest and creative. Remember that it is a job for two people. You will not be able to make a difference if your partner is not there for you.
There are so many things that you can do in order to rekindle this relationship. So, keep working because the reward is priceless.
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