Thrive II Preview

Not Feeling Very Merry? Here’s How to Cope

ChampagneThe truth is, not everyone is feeling particularly merry or happy right now.

This can be a tough time of the year for many…


I have friends who have suffered great loss this year with the untimely death of loved ones.

Many people are experiencing their first holiday season without their spouse or children as ‘two homes’ has come into effect.

The first time we cycle through any holiday or experience after the loss of someone in our lives, there is a painful calibration to the new truth as we realize that things will never quite be the same again.

You are right.

Things will never be the same again.

It will however be what it is.

A new state will emerge.  It will take two or three years before the new state, the new traditions and the new possibilities take form and before long, we reconcile that however much we miss the old way, the new way is alright too.

If you are here (or someone you care about is here) go easy on yourself as you feel the swelling up of emotions in your throat from time to time.

Know that this is normal. Let the state come up and wash over you… and leave.

You don’t need to hang on to it.

It will come up on it’s very own again. Again, be true to the moment and let.it.pass.

When we hold on to emotions we lock them in.

Grief is normal. Let it come.

And let it go.

It doesn’t make you less loyal to your loved one.

It doesn’t make you ‘a forgotten parent’ because you were not with them Christmas morning or will ring the new year in without them.

It doesn’t make the loss less real if you allow pain to exit just as quickly as it came up.

Allow it all.

Grief-compressedAnd yes, much to your surprise, little pockets of joy will find their way to you too. There is nothing to feel guilty of when these show their way.

Have your pain without committing to martyrdom and have your joy without apology.

It is a way of honouring that what was and what is.

Next year, the pain shards will be less and the joyful moments will be more. This much, I can promise you.

Let me hear your thoughts.

 

Farhana Dhalla 172x204

Farhana Dhalla is a #1 Best Selling Author, International Life Coach & Speaker, and Creator of the transformational Thank You for Leaving Me Journey. She is the visionary and leader of the enlightened divorce movement and  the ultimate ‘go to’ person for shifting perspective. As a ‘suddenly single mom’ to three small children, she intimately knows the overwhelming fear and pain – -and the liberation of stepping into the highest version of oneself. Check out her free webinar Divorce Is Not Your Fault and connect with her on Twitter and Facebook

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Subscribe

If you enjoyed this article, subscribe now to receive more just like it.

Subscribe via RSS Feed Connect on YouTube

New Title

NOTE: Email is optional. Do NOT enter it if you do NOT want it displayed.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

FAIR USE NOTICE. Many of the articles on this site contain copyrighted material whose use has not been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making this material available in an effort to advance the understanding of environmental issues, human rights, economic and political democracy, and issues of social justice. We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of the copyrighted material as provided for in Section 107 of the US Copyright Law which contains a list of the various purposes for which the reproduction of a particular work may be considered fair, such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. If you wish to use such copyrighted material for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use'...you must obtain permission from the copyright owner. And, if you are a copyright owner who wishes to have your content removed, let us know via the "Contact Us" link at the top of the site, and we will promptly remove it.

The information on this site is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional advice of any kind. Conscious Life News assumes no responsibility for the use or misuse of this material. Your use of this website indicates your agreement to these terms.

Paid advertising on Conscious Life News may not represent the views and opinions of this website and its contributors. No endorsement of products and services advertised is either expressed or implied.
Top
Send this to a friend