8 Signs You’re Surrounded By Toxic Friends You Don’t Deserve

Written by on September 16, 2017 in Conscious Evolution, Conscious Living with 0 Comments

By Power Of Positivity

“Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.” – Travis Bradberry

Everyone deserves to be surrounded by people who are kind and positive and bring out the best in them. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case with the people that we surround ourselves with on a day-to-day basis. Pinpointing a toxic individual isn’t always easy, and we often stay friends with people who aren’t good for us much longer than we have to.

Karen Salmansohn pointed out, “The more you stay with and/or complain about a toxic person, the more you’re merely delaying doing the important inner work you need to do – to heal your wounds, expand your limiting beliefs, and show yourself far more love and respect.”

Learning to identify a toxic friend is a skill that everyone should have in their back pocket. You may find that you’re surrounding yourself with people who don’t deserve your company, and who are making your life much harder and more negative than it has to be.

Here Are 8 Signs You Are Surrounded By Toxic People You Need To Let Go

1. They break plans and leave you stranded

Sometimes, life gets in the way and we may find that we have to cancel plans with our friends. This is a normal part of life. However, you may be friends with a toxic person if they’re constantly cancelling on you – because something better has come along. This means that they’ll make plans with you so long as there isn’t something better for them to do. Be on the lookout for friends who seem to always be cancelling on your plans together. It’s a good sign that they don’t respect your time.

2. They talk behind your back

Some people will say positive things about their friends to other people because they genuinely enjoy them and are proud of their achievements. However, toxic friends will be saying cruel and hurtful things behind your back. You’ll find out that they may be gossiping about you or making fun of you to others.

These types of people may try to play it off as a joke, but it’s a red flag that you deserve better. But have you ever wondered why they talk behind your back? As Jill Blakeway rightly points out, “When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth just like you did.”

3. They spill secrets no matter how much it would hurt you

If you tell a friend something in confidence, it’s generally assumed that they won’t tell other people. A toxic friend cannot be trusted to keep your secrets, and you may find that other people already know about something that you told this friend in confidence. This is a toxic behavior and shows that they’re not a trustworthy person. It also shows that they only care about having something interesting to say to other people, even if it comes at your expense.

4. They tell jokes at your expense

Joking around with your friends and teasing one another often comes with having to learn to laugh at yourself a little. However, with a toxic friend, the jokes are always at your expense, and they’re always just a little too mean. But what’s the difference between humor that helps and humor that hurts?

As Joel Goodman from West Side Toastmasters mention, “Many people who use negative humor just don’t know any better – or any alternative. Most of what they have seen, heard and experienced is toxic humor – humor used as a weapon rather than as a tool. It’s no wonder this is the style they adopt. Laughing with others leaves people with whole self-esteem; laughing at others leaves people with a hole in their self-esteem.”

You may also notice that this person won’t ever tolerate jokes at their expense, and that they brush off your feelings when you try to explain that their jokes are harmful.


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