Men, Here Are 10 Things You Need to Understand About Women If You Want to Be a Great Lover

Posted by on August 3, 2017 in Conscious Living, Relationships & Sex with 2 Comments

smiling contented couple in bed-compressed

By Renee Segal | Segal Psychotherapy

What do women want sexually?

Most of the men that I work with want to understand their loved ones better. The first step is to find out her preferences, what she likes and dislikes. You can do this by asking her.

Related Article: The Way You Ask for What You Want In Bed is Important: Here Are 5 Ways NOT to Do It

1. Women are different than men. Men can be very content just hanging out and being with his partner, watching TV, walking, driving etc. This shared activity is a type of intimacy that men are used to with their buddies. Women want interaction!  Yup, that is face to face interaction which leads us to number 2.

2. Women love words and talking. Women view a heathy relationship as one in which there is talking and open communication. Even if there is conflict women tend to view things more postively if they can talk about it openly. Don’t forget the obvious here women love compliments and affirmations, who doesn’t?

3. Women think of sex as part of a close relationship. The media, television and the movies tends to confuse this issue. Most women that I work with that engage in sex without intimacy view it as unappealing and bad.That’s right, “casual sex” doesn’t work for the majority of women. My clients report feeling empty, bad and shameful afterwards.

4. Women want men focused, listening and paying attention. This is one of the most common compliments I hear; “He isn’t there” or “He is off in the Bahamas”, “Where is he?”  PAY ATTENTION WHEN SHE IS TALKING! Give her attention. Here is a little extra tip, most women that have affairs report that they did it because their affair partner paid attention to her.

5. Women want to be taken seriously. If she says no, stop what you are doing. This goes especially for sexual behavior. If she doesn’t want sex right now you can still try to convince her but if she doesn’t like something you are doing such as blowing in her ear, then stop. Don’t belittle or shame her in front of others, nothing kills sex drive for women than not feeling safe.

Related Article: 7 Powerful Trust Exercises for Couples to Build More Intimacy

6. Women want to talk more than men, especially after an argument.  Something I see regularly is after a fight men want to have sex to reconnect and calm down. She doesn’t want to because the conflict isn’t resolved. Here is that difference again. Any words will do in this situation, rather than pretending that the fight didn’t happen. “Honey, I know we aren’t resolved yet but I would like to make love now”. This will go a long way to bridge the conflict gap.


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  1.' Kemal Türkmen says:

    İnstagram Turkmen0 Takip Et 😀 (Bot) Ekle ☺ ^_^

  2.' ipragmatist says:

    In other words, as a guy, give up what you would normally do as a male and follow the instructions and be what women want you to be. Sounds logical to me.

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