Breakups are never easy.
Some more painful than others.
Especially when you feel like you have given your all to the relationship or felt like this was going to be forever.
You attracted your partner because there were certain lessons that your souls were meant to teach each other.
You attract to yourself a reflection of your own consciousness at that particular time.
As you both evolve and grow, who you were when you first met won’t be who you are months, years or decades into your relationship.
This is growth.
As long as you grow together at a similar pace, in a similar direction, with a similar vision and core values, you are able to keep growing.
The challenge is when either one of you stops growing or you grow in directions that are too far apart to find common ground.
You can see breaking up as a failure, or you can see it as a gift.
Here are 4 steps to dealing with a breakup:
- Take space: Take time alone to be with yourself. A mistake that people make is immediately jumping into another relationship when they haven’t dealt with their emotions from the previous one. Jumping into a new relationship can be a distraction and keep you stuck, since your unresolved emotions will likely cloud your new relationship. It’s important to take the time to rediscover yourself again.
- Feel your feelings: Breakups can be painful. Sometimes so excruciating that we do whatever we can to not feel the pain. Avoiding the pain simply keeps you stuck. The quickest way to let go, is to consciously feel the pain without judgment or resistance. Not wallowing in it but simply feeling it with intention to release it. No feelings last forever, and all feelings that you feel fully will dissolve. Give yourself permission to grieve and trust that you will indeed move through it.
- Learn the lessons: All lessons are repeated until learned. If you don’t learn the lessons in your relationship, you will simply repeat it in another. So take time to reflect on – Why you attracted this person into your life? What lessons did you need to learn? Did you learn those lessons? How did you grow? What would you have done differently?
- Forgiveness and gratitude: After a breakup, it can be easy to have some feelings of resentment or anger, especially if the other person didn’t meet your expectations. Holding on to resentments only brings you down. When you forgive, you set yourself free. So choose to forgive, bless your partner, and let them go. How you break up will impact your next relationship.
Each person comes into your life for a different purpose. Some will stay for a brief moment, some for a season and some for a lifetime.
Just because the form of your relationship ends, it doesn’t mean the loving needs to stop or that it’s been a failure. It just means you needed to find a different form that most allows you both to grow into the highest version of yourself.
When you commit to loving no matter what, then you are free.
So trust that someone even better for you is being orchestrated by the universe and will show up at exactly the right time.
Your breakup is a blessing in disguise, clearing the way for more love in your life.
Your heart can never be broken.
Your heart is stronger than you know.
Your heart is made of the stuff of the universe.
You are love itself.